


To Love A Dixon

by rachelarcher



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Daryl is Bad at Relationships, F/F, F/M, M/M, carl and judith are rick's younger siblings, daryl is a father too, lori and rick are siblings, merle is a dad, merle is bad at keeping promises, merle is good, merle is married
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-11
Updated: 2016-04-11
Packaged: 2018-06-01 16:59:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6528433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rachelarcher/pseuds/rachelarcher
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bobbi had been the first friend Daryl Dixon ever made, and she tried hard to help him when he asked for help. But somethings can't be helped, and there is no saving Bobbi, when she inadvertantly ends up pregnant with Daryl's babies. Merle proves his worth, but in the end when you love a Dixon, you never win.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Love A Dixon

**Author's Note:**

> I promise I am getting back to the others, this was the second to last little idea I had to work out so I could get back to the series.

The first time Rick Grimes met the Dixon’s it was a domestic dispute, not really what he would have labeled as such, but who was labeling these things anyway. The short of the matter was that one Bobbi Lynn Dixon had attacked one Andrea Horvath. The reason - Merle Dixon. 

Rick wasn’t exactly sure in the first moments what was going on, until one Daryl Dixon walked up to him and said. “Ain’t no need for the cops here, fella. Just my sister’n law doin’ whut she threatened my damn cheat’n brother she’d do if’n she caught him with Andrea ‘gain.” 

Rick only nodded, and waited for a moment, seeing Andrea fly through the door, screaming, with whom he believed to be Bobbi on her heels. Little hell cat didn’t let up. “You damn homewreck’n wench, ya know damn well we got kids, an ya had Merle laid out drunk n’ high n’ fuckin’ ya the last three weeks, lost our damn house ya fuckin’ tramp.” She punctuated the tramp with a rough slap to the face.

“Maybe if ya kept yer man satisfied, wouldn’t need ta come round me.” Andrea spat on her.

Rick had never quite seen a display such as this, but he felt Daryl’s hand on his shoulder. “Not yet, friendly, less’n ya wanna get hit.” 

“Ain’t about satisfaction, Andrea.” She snarled. “Diff’rence ‘tween you ‘nd me, is he has ta work for my love, ya just open yer legs and light up the fuckin’ runway.” She snarled. Landing a solid right handed punch to Andrea’s face. “You come round my my man again, darlin’ and I will fuckin end yer ass. We clear?”

Andrea coughed, blood slippin out her mouth, but nodded. “A’ight, Bobbi ya win, I’ll take back up with Shane, only fucked with Merle for his stash.” 

Bobbi stood, wiping her bloody hands on her shorts, and frowned. “Stay away from him, ain’t playin’.” She whirled on Merle then, hands on her hips. “Get yer ass in the van, Merle.” He looked like he was about to argue, but she shot him a harsh look, and he tucked tail and darted into the van. “Daryl, you too, boy, time ta’ go camp, since we ain’t got a house.” It was a snarl.

“Wait.” Rick had his hands up in a show of defeat. “I have a place, ain’t living there anymore, was my parents house, it’s got some furniture in it, you're welcome to it.” Rick was sprawling an address down. “If ya want it. No rent, just… keep Merle outta jail some.”

“A’ight.” Daryl and Bobbi answered at the same time, agreeing.

-/-

Bobbi was a year older than Daryl, when they met on the playground. She hid him from the older kids, who were bullying. Her name was Bobbi Lynn Banton, she was the youngest in a family of eight. All older brothers. She had told Daryl they were going to be best friends and she wasn’t lying. 

Daryl never played without her after that, and she even purposely failed third grade so they could remain together, that was about the time his mom died in the house fire, and he realized he really liked boys, in the way most people liked girls.

At 16 he asked her to help him, to make him understand why he didn’t like girls right. An evening of experimentation had led to a pregnant Bobbi. Merle, understanding Daryl better than maybe anyone ever guessed, stepped up and said it was his mistake. At the time he was 28 to her 16, and god the whole town talked.

Her parents organized a shotgun wedding, and for what it was worth Merle really tried, when William, their father died, things got better. Merle, Bobbi, and Daryl welcomed twins Archer and Colten into the world. Bobbi and Daryl graduated. 

Merle was good, so good, for about three years, then the judge said jail or army, and Merle opted to serve his country. Daryl had found a job at a garage, and Bobbi at the diner. For a while, everything was going pretty good, Merle came in on leave, and nine months later, Merle’s first child that was his was born, a pretty little girl named Winter, after when she was born. 

Then had come another little boy, Axel, and a second little girl named August, for when she was conceived. So, five kids were five hungry mouths to feed. How Merle met Andrea Daryl would never know, but Andrea had caused what he would lovingly call a point of contention these days.

Bobbi was very much in love with Merle, always had been, something similar to hero worship, no doubt. Merle did love her, contrary to the way the looked, at this moment Merle was tugging her onto his lap and apologizing. She was 28 now, and Daryl 27, which put Merle right at 40. He was snuggling up to her like she was his only chance at heaven.

Archer and Colton were eleven, Winter was seven, Axel was six, and August was four. They were all seated around the dinner table doing their school work, while Bobbi was cooking. Daryl had taken over her spot since Merle had drug her into his lap. “Now, momma, ‘ah am sorry, very very sorry.” Merle was muttering it into her hair.

“I know ya are, ya damn asshole. Yer always sorry, Merle. Sorry for leavin’ me, leavin’ Daryl, leavin’ the kids, sorry ya came back from overseas with a damn addiction to opium. Sorry ya couldn’t love me an’ only me, sorry for everythin’, Merle I have heard it thousands of times.” She grumbled.

“Gonna leave me now?” He sounded like he was sobbing, when Daryl turned around he realized his brother was crying.

“Nah, ya sorry shit, ain’t gonna leave ya Merle Dixon, love ya too damn much, to the point it doesn’t make sense to me or anyone else.” She was holding him around his neck, pulling his lips to hers, and kissing him.

Rick was at the table next to Archer, helping him with some math. When Rick said he had a house, and it was rent free he had failed to mention the part where he would be staying in the apartment over the garage. So on their first night in the house he was eating with them.

“Bobbi, sis, come on, need ya.” Daryl growled.

Merle gently helped her off his lap, but caught her for one more kiss, which she sealed with a small chaste kiss to his lips. Rick watched the family dynamics. Archer nudged Colt, “Dad ya best listen ta momma, or else she is gonna beat the shit outta you.”

“Language, Archer.” Bobbi snarled.

“Shit, mom, already beat the breaks off Andrea, Dar told us all about it.” Colt laughed.

“Language, Colt.” Bobbi warned.

“Mommmma.” August whinned. “I’m staaaarving.”

“Baby, I am trying.” Bobbi sighed. She and Daryl were pretty good cooks, but it took a lot feeding them. 

“Need to explain why I asked you guys here.” Rick grumbled. “My younger brother and sister, Carl and Judith, they are coming to live with me, and I don’t know… I don’t know how to take care of them. Bobbi, you are the only woman in town I have seen that I trust… with them.” 

“You trust a Dixon with your kids.” She laughed. Dinner was served, pork chops, corn on the cob, biscuits, mashed potatoes, gravy, and french fries. 

“Look, you all know I just moved here and I saw how you defended what was yours, Bobbi, I wanna make sure someone will look after them.” Rick grumbled. “Carl is the same age as your twins, and Jude is three.”

“A’ight, but you know Merle has… problems.” Bobbi clarified, eyebrows raised at Rick. He only nodded.

-/-

Merle robbed a gas station two towns over not too long after that, high as a kite. He went to real prison, with no chance of Bobbi rescuing him. When Maggie called for Rick it was because Daryl was drinking too much, and not going to be safe to drive or go anywhere.

Bobbi got there before him, apparently leaving Carl in charge at the house. She was four months pregnant, and irritated to no end, she didn’t even bother to pay the man at the door, just made her way to where Daryl sat, and placed a hand on his shoulder. “It’s time to go home, brother.” She squeezed his arm, he pushed her off and frowned.

“Ain’t never gonna be nice ta ya Bobbi, he ain't, gonna run you and them kids into tha ground… and so far ‘ah have just let him.” Daryl growled, throwing back another shot.

“Wouldn’t have anything to do with Jesus leavin’ ya, now would it?” She asked, taking a seat next to him on a bar stool.

“No, fuck him, fuck Merle, and fuck you.” Daryl snarled.

“Now Dar, don’t be like that, you know I love you, let’s get you home.” She begged.

Rick joined them the next moment, sitting on the other side of the Daryl. “Daryl, let’s get you outta here. Merle getting locked up and Jesus breaking it off with you, it ain’t the end of the world…”

“Shuttup Rick, ain’t like ya know, hard ta find love in the South if yer queer.” Daryl spat the world.

Bobbi growled. “Let’s get the hell outta here, Daryl, now.” 

“No.” He snarled. “Not going.”

“Last time I am asking you, come with me now Daryl James Dixon, or I am letting Rick lock your ass up in the drunk tank.” Bobbi snarled.

“Ain’t never been to jail, Bobbi.” Even as he said it, his shoulder’s sagged. 

“Ok, fella, come on.” She caught him round his middle, and he held on to her for dear life. 

He stood on shaky legs, but she managed to get him out. Maggie looked over the bar at Rick. “Grimes, you're the new cop, partnering with Abraham Ford, right?” 

Rick nodded. “What’s their story?”

“Oh, those two? Been friends since kindergarten. Everyone round here thought they’d end up together, the twins are Daryl’s, Merle was in jail when she got pregnant, but he stepped up, since Daryl’s batting for his own team and all.” Maggie pushed the offered money away. “If’n I charged the Dixon’s for drinkin here, I’d be a millionaire. Thier momma was my daddy’s second wife’s sister, so they’s family, loosely. Well, Bobbi ain’t, but… I love her just the same, startin’ to show again. You’d think she and Merle’d stop, five kids is enough for anyone.”

Rick just looked at Maggie. “You know her and Merle really seem to love each other when it’s them and the kids, she is a protector though.”

“She’d have to love him, saw what she did to Andrea’s face, her sister works here as one of my waitresses, Andrea just took a job here too actually, she’s training. Bobbi don’t play, never has, when it comes to the Dixon’s, how long is Merle locked up for this time?” Maggie asked. 

“Minimum of five years, Merle is lucky that the gas station in question didn’t wanna press charges, don’t know how she does it, Bobbi, keepin’ up with both of them.” Rick sighed.

“Daryl don’t give her problems, it's Merle, and the kids, least I figure the kids gotta.” Maggie laughed.

“The kids are actually well behaved.” Rick muttered. “Listen well and everything, Bobbi has them taught. She has been keeping my younger brother and sister, my dad and stepmom died not too long ago in a plane crash.” Rick rubbed at his arm, then nodded at Maggie. “Thanks for the drink.”

-/-

“Rick, stop sleepin in the garage.” Daryl grumbled. “Ya can sleep in my room, yer kids already sleep in the house, and it’s yer fucking house.”

“I dunno man.” Rick laughed.

“Is it cause I like dick?” Daryl asked, making Bobbi snort, she was baking, it was Winter’s birthday and she was making her favorite cake - spice cake.

“Nah, we are on the same team man, it’s cause I think you're cute, and don’t wanna get any ideas.” Rick growled back, low.

Bobbi giggled to herself, stirring up icing. “Get all the idea’s ya want.” Daryl laughed. Merle had been in jail five months, and Bobbi was due any day now, another set of twins, this time a boy and a girl.

“Best get to settlin’ on names since Merle ain’t gonna be ‘round ta name these two.” She laughed.

“Been thinkin’ on that.” Rick said, after a moment. “I get ta name the boy, right.”

“Right, Daryl named the first twins.” She nodded.

“So, Daryl what girl name have you picked?” Rick asked.

Daryl looked at him for a long moment then said, “Jeanette, after our momma.” 

Rick smiled, “How about Calhoun, it means warrior.” 

“I like ‘uhm both.” She smiled at the two at the table.

“Should we call the kids in from the yard?” Rick asked. “Dinner time?”

“Yeah, go on.”

-/-

It was Rick who rushed her to the hospital, and held her hand through the delivery. Bobbi laughed and said very pointedly, “Merle ain’t never seen his kids born, was there for the older twins, though.”

Rick had gotten a laugh outta that, and was amazed when she named the little girl Jeanette Renee, and the little boy Calhoun Richard. Renee was his step mother’s name, and also Judith’s middle name. Rick was the first man to hold both babies, and rock them.

Daryl came when his shift was over at work, and with him, all the kids, everyone wanted to hold the new little ones, which brought their house number up to nine under twelve, and only three on any given day over eighteen.

“Jet and Cal.” Daryl nuzzled them, kissing their foreheads and smiling at the little squishy babies. This part never got old, as far as Daryl was concerned. Babies were the best part of sex. When the nurses took them away, Bobbi caught Daryl’s hand. 

“Brother, take care of the kids.” She told him. “Tomorrow run up and tell Merle bout the kids, ok?”

“You got it, momma.” Daryl kissed her temple, and herded the kids out of there, each one kissing their momma goodbye and telling her they loved her.

When everyone was out of the room, in came Beth Greene, the only maternity nurse she had ever seen, was hovering. “Must be nice, you get rest when you're here.”

“Ain’t like that Bethy. I love my kids.” Bobbi sighed.

“I know you do, Bobbi, I just, your body is gonna be used up, too many more babies.” Beth climbed onto the bed next to Bobbi. “No other folks tonight, so I am going to cuddle with you and watch crappy horror movies, I know you like them, so I rented several.”

“Oh, Beth, you were the best kid I ever baby sat.” She nudged the younger woman on the shoulder. “Whens your birthday?”

“Turn 21 in almost three weeks, you coming?” Beth asked her.

“Of course, that stud you been seeing gonna be there?” Bobbi asked.

“Yes ma’am.” Beth laughed. 

“Don’t call me ma’am.” Bobbi snapped.

“Why’d ya do it?” Beth asked suddenly very solemn.

“Whatcha mean Bethy?” Bobbi asked.

“Sleep with Daryl if you knew…” Her voice trailed off.

“Aha, you know Bethy you're the first person to ask me that.” Bobbi paused. “You gotta know me and Daryl, we been friends long as he could talk real well, met him when he started kindergarten, failed the third grade to stay an’ take care of them. By the time we was in middle school we both knew something was different about him, I think I figured out he was into dudes before he did. But in the south that ain’t somethin’ ya talk about.” She paused again. “So, we agreed on a plan. I’d be his girlfriend, love on him just enough to convince everyone he was normal, or at least Merle and his daddy’s version of normal. It was prom night.” She laughed. “And my idea, I didn’t mean to get pregnant, and Merle… when he came home, he accepted what his father never could. Merle decided to marry me, since I was in the family way with Dixon’s anyway, and to let Daryl off the hook, knew he’d never be happy married to me. Merle and I were friends anyway, and eventually we sorta fell into a easy love. I don’t take his shit, and he loves the kids.” She laughed.

“You saved both them boys.” Beth snuggled closer to her.

“Nah, they saved me.” She rested her head on Beth.

“Bobbi, do you love Merle? Like the forever kind.” Beth asked.

“Now, baby, what’s all these questions about?” Bobbi raised her eyebrows.

“Thinkin’ Noah’s gonna ask me to marry him, is all, wanna make sure…” She trailed off.

“I love Merle, gonna love his sorry ass the rest of my life, Beth, gonna probably have some more babies, and be typical white trash, but…” She sighed. “Ain’t like I got prospects, ain’t nobody gonna take a woman an seven little mouths ta feed, with tha last name Dixon.” 

Beth only nodded. “How did you know you loved him enough?”

“Honey, thought I made it clear, my marriage weren't outta love it was outta necessity, momma and daddy wanted to make me honest.” Bobbi offered.

“But you fell in love with him after a while.” Beth said.

“Probably around having Axel I accepted I loved Merle Dixon, been takin’ care to show him that since then, ain’t like it amounted ta much, can’t keep him clean.” She frowned.

“He was hooked on drugs long before you, though.” Beth comforted her.

“Yeah, by my momma always said real love could get you through everything, including addictions. Guess it just proves that Merle and me, we love each other, but it ain’t true.” She mumbled.

-/-

Rick took three days off of work, to help watch the kids while Daryl worked. Bobbi had came home from the hospital but still couldn’t do much. She was currently laid in the recliner, with Cal and Jet stretched across her lap, all the others kids in school. It was a Tuesday, Rick was washing dishes. “Ricky, come here.” She called him.

“What’s up, Bobbi?” He asked as he made it into the livingroom.

“Ya like Daryl, don’t ya. Been living here almost six months and this morning I saw ya move your stuff into his room, ya gonna make a move?” She asked, eyebrows wiggling.

“I dunno, don’t wanna mess anything up.” Rick shrugged.

“Let me help ya out.” She laughed. “Daryl goes bowling on Tuesday nights, ask him if you can go with him tonight, I can manage around here, we gonna order a pizza, anyway.” 

Rick just stared at her for a minute then nodded. “Should I call Beth or Maggie?”

“Call Maggie, tell her to have that husband of hers make the big pizza the kids like an’ I’ll figure out a way to pay ‘uhm, and see if Beth and her man Noah will come up with uhm, Beth said yes ta’ marryin’ him and I wanna talk weddin’ shit. Helped Maggie with hers, was even ‘ah bridesmaid.” She winked at Rick, who laughed at her but headed into the kitchen to phone the Greene sisters.

He ducked back in however, to ask a question. “How ya know Maggie anyway?”

“We was in school together, me, her, Daryl, Glenn, all the same year.” She offered. “Maggie and Dar are cousins through marriage.” She explained.

“Aha, Beth ya babysat though right?” He asked.

She nodded, and went back to nursing the babies. Rick had to admit she might not be the most girly girl he had ever met, but Bobbi Dixon had a heart of gold and with him that would go miles.

He picked up the rotary phone in the kitchen and dialed Maggie’s house number. “Rhee residence, Glenn speaking.” 

“Glenn, its Rick Grimes.” 

“Hey Sheriff, what can I get ya?”

“Bobbi mentioned a big pizza you make for her brood? Any way you could fix us up one this afternoon and you and Maggie come up?” Rick asked.

“Sure thang, Rick, listen man, it was nice ‘ah ya to let them live in yer parent’s house, Maggie just loves Bobbi, and mosta tha time I love Merle, but ya know how he can be… It’ll take me an hour or so, but i’ll be over for schools done.” Glenn offered.

“Thanks man, is Bethy at Hershels?”

“She ought to be. Hold on,” Glenn paused then shouted, “MAGGIE IS BETH AT YER DADDY’S?”

Rick heard Maggie shout back a “YES”. Then Glenn said, “See ya this afternoon.”

Rick hung up the phone, then dialed Hershel's, it was Annette who answered. “Greene residence, this is Annette.”

“Hi Mrs. Annette, can I talk ta Bethy, this is Rick Grimes.” 

“Rick, the Sheriff, is something wrong?”

“No ma’am, I’m callin’ for Bobbi, she want’s ta know if Bethy can come over and help her with the kids tonight.” Rick sighed.

“Oh, that’s right, them Dixon’s live in yer household on.” This time Rick was ready with the hold on he moved the phone from his ear and heard Annette shout, “BETHY PHONE CALL FROM THE SHERIFF.”

Before he could register that the phone had changed hands, he heard, “Is something wrong with Bobbi? Has something happened to Merle?”

“Shit, no, Bethy, Bobbi wants to spend time with ya tonight, asked if you’d bring your man and come over for some of Glenn’s extra large pizza.”

“Thought you were gonna take time off to watch the kids.” Beth accused.

“She wants me to go bowling with Daryl tonight.”

“You like him, huh?” Beth teased.

“What do you know about it.” Rick grumbled.

“Know Bobbi’s been watchin’ you two dance around each other for almost six months.” Beth laughed.

-/-

Daryl came home in a mood, a fowl one, and Beth and Maggie were quick to grab the little babies from Bobbi, and herd the kids into the livingroom, while Glenn helped Bobbi up. Once she was up she was trailing after Daryl, he was cursing up a storm, and muttering.

Rick watched as they both disappeared into the bathroom, and frowned. Maybe he had misjudged their relationship, but he heard Bobbi holler for him and the first aid kit, he knocked on the door, and Bobbi opened it. “Rick, get in here.” She ordered, dragging him in.

“What happened?” Rick finds himself looking at Daryl who is naked from the waist up laid out in the tub, blood seeping from a wound on his chest.

“Go on, tell him, baby brother.” Bobbi orders, as she maneuvers herself onto his lap in the tub and starts wiping away at his chest.

“Shane Walsh, came by the shop ta’day, he’s a cop, so I figured ya sent him, ‘cept he’s lookin’ for the Dixon that got Andrea… in the family way.” Rick sees the sag in Bobbi’s shoulders and can tell she’s hurt. “Say’s he's gonna marry Andrea, but he ain’t takin’ care of trash. So I says, plain as day, it were Merle, but that ‘ah know Bobbi, she’d take tha little one in, no trouble, just that he needed ta come round here.” Daryl paused, and inhaled deeply as Bobbi worked the needle into his flesh.

“Then what happened?” Rick asked. He and Shane had been getting along for the most part, Shane had dated Rick’s sister Lori briefly, but she was engaged to a charming has-been football player who went by T-Dog these days. 

“Well, Shane weren’t hav’n that.” Daryl offered like that explained everything, “Started in sayin’ how maybe it was me tryin’ ta figure out if’n I liked dicks or not, fuckin’ round with his girl. Shane was overseas when Merle an’ Andrea was messin’ round.” Daryl explained. “Guess’n he don’t know me too well, but he swung at me, then we just went ta fightin. Lost my job, Bobbi, shit, ‘ah am so sorry, keep tryin’ ta be somethin’ other than Merle, and it jus’ ain’t workin’.” Daryl heaved a heavy sigh.

Rick saw red, he was out of the bathroom and out of the house before Bobbi could stop him. Just, gone. “Where da ya think he’s off to?” Bobbi mused.

“Ta defend my honor maybe?” Daryl laughed at that.

“Who knows.” Bobbi frowned, “He was gonna go bowlin with ya tonight, likes ya Dar, but ya can’t stretch these stitches.” She kissed his forehead, and took his hands as she pushed herself up and outta the tub.

-/-

Kane Dixon was born three days later, Rick had worked everything out with Morgan Jones who was the town's social worker, and Kane came home from the hospital the day he was born. Only seven days younger than Cal and Jet. Morgan changed his birth certificate, so if anyone went snooping, she had triplets, instead of twins.

Kane struggled with nursing, and was small and frail compared to Bobbi’s other children, Rick noticed it, the baby boy looked sickly. “It’s the drugs.” Beth explained, the morning Rick brought Kane home. Little thing was bundled up tight, and still shivering. 

Beth hadn’t left the house since she and Noah had came for dinner almost five days ago, she had taken over the guest room and when not at work was helping Bobbi around the house, since she was a pediatric nurse she had been able to bring all the equipment home they would need for Kane. “He’s addicted to whatever Andrea was on, and withdraws ain’t gonna be easy.” Bobbi finished the thought for Beth.

Daryl had spent most of his time looking for a job, and had lucked into one at a hunting shop over in Athens. He was cooking something he had killed, out of season, a white tailed doe, in the kitchen when Rick made it home, Abraham Ford behind him. “Dinner ready?”

Carl, Archer, and Colt were playing on the x-box that had came with Carl. Judith, August, and Winter we're playin in the living room with baby doll. Axel was wound round his mother’s legs, as she peaked into the three bassinets they had situated in the kitchen so her and Beth could cook. It was Thanksgiving. Rick had no clue where time had went.

“Gonna be living here now, Rick, until I get married next Christmas, at least.” Beth offered, and raised an eyebrow as if daring him to question it. “With Merle gone someone needs to help her get the three little babies further grown before he gets home.”

“Which reminds me, it’s about time I called him.” Bobbi smiled a little and dialed a number from memory. “Would like ta talk ta Merle Dixon, please.” She paused, “This is his wife, Bobbi.” 

It was just a few minutes later, before she managed to put him on speaker phone. “Bobbi, this place, it ain’t for me, it ain’t easy here, not like it was in county, see if Friendly can get me transferred.” 

“I’ll see what I can do.” Rick said, over the rumbled of children.

“Merle, ya got Andrea pregnant.” Daryl snarled, moving past them all to the living room, controller in hand, and Axle under his arm like a football.

“Is that so, Bobbi?” Merle sounded pained.

“Merle, ya always promised me I’d be the only mother ta yer children, lucky for you, Kane Dixon is here, in my house, and I legally adopted him, Shane is gonna make Andrea a honest woman, and hopefully move away, you do this shit to me again, boy, and I’ll hide yer body so well in the bayou won’t nobody find ya.” 

“Jesus, woman, I get it, I’m clean, and when I come home, I’s plannin ta stay thataway, wanna see my kids grow up, don’t wanna be like William.” In the livingroom Daryl snorted and muttered something like yer already like him, only difference is ya snort he drank.

Abraham’s voice was the next. “Merle, if we get you transferred maybe you could do a work release program or something. Rick and Daryl been talking about how to get you a job.” 

“Rick and Daryl, that mean baby brother’s finally found a dick he likes.” Merle teased.

“Merle Jackson Dixon, ya shut yer mouth, and talk ta yer babies.” It’s little August on the phone first. “Hey daddy, I love you, have a good Thanksgiving, wish ya was here.” Then Axel, “Hey dad. Love you, hope to see you soon.” Then Winter, “Hey paw, love you, gonna teach me to hunt when ya get out, right?”, Then Colt, “Hey dad, love you, promise ta take care of momma until yer out.” Then Archer, “Dad, promise when you get out you won't miss another holiday, never see you on Christmas, and I love you dad.” 

Archer hangs up, and looks at his momma, the twelve year old is wide in the shoulders, with a tapered waist, and wiry same as Colt, neither favor Merle much they look like miniature Daryl’s, and both wrap their arms around their momma, pulling her into a hug. “We gonna get a paper route momma, and deliver papers to help ya make money.” 

“Thank ya babies, ya know, Daryl used to deliver papers, ‘ah used to help him.” She kissed their cheeks, they were already taller than their momma. Axel, Winter, and August favor Merle, they are stocky and wide, built like linebackers, and stout. 

Thanksgiving dinner ends, and Abraham is on his way, Beth and Bobbi have all the kids in bed, and Beth is sleeping with her, something Rick noticed was common, even in their twenties, leaving Daryl and Rick alone in the living room.

“Think we ought to talk.” Daryl grumbled, he was stretched out on the couch, Rick plopped down next to him.

“Bout what?” Rick asked, resting his head somewhat on Daryl’s shoulder.

“Bout you sleepin’ in my bed but nothin’ else happenin’.” Daryl growled, low and husky.

“Been waitin’ on you to show ya was interested.” Rick laughed, then moved, quickly, to straddle Daryl’s lap. Rick’s hands planted on Daryl’s shoulders as he lowered himself, ready for lips to connect. Both froze with the pitter patter of little feet, Winter was in the kitchen, opened the refrigerator and grabbed the orange juice, before closing it back and disappearing. 

“Guess I know where my OJ goes.” Daryl sighed, his hands moving up Rick’s frame to hold his neck, “Ya know ‘ah am damaged, right, been through shit, Merle and daddy beat me, most ‘ah my life, Bobbi is my best friend…” 

“Daryl, I know.” Then Rick lowered his lips to Daryl;s, and it was complete perfection. Daryl had never felt anything quite like this before, his heart thundering in his ears, suddenly there was only Rick, only him, dancing a dance all their own, lost in a world created from the burning embers of their kiss.

The light in the kitchen flickered on, and they reluctantly broke apart, Bobbi was standing in the doorway, her arms across her chest. “Ya’ll might ought to head up ta bed, tomorrow ya’ll promised ta help me take the kids up ta see Merle.” 

It was a mother’s tone, and meant to send them both to bed, they agreed, and she chased them up the stairs, when Rick chanced a look down, he saw her at the table, a bottle of beer in front of her, and her face in her hands. “She deals with Merle being gone… she misses him.” Rick frowned.

He didn’t think on it long, Daryl caught his wrist, and squeezed enough that Rick shook thoughts of Bobbi from his head, he tumbled into bed with Daryl, kisses and light caresses. When Rick woke, Daryl was tangled around him, his head on Rick’s chest, and his legs tangled with Rick’s. 

Already there was a buzz of activity downstairs. Bobbi was clearly rounding the children up. “Ok, teenagers, Carl, Archer, Colt, ya’lls gonna ride with Rick and Daryl. Winter, Judith, August, Axel, ya’ll gonna ride with Maggie, no back talk. Gonna put the little babies with me and Beth,” She paused. “Everyone eaten breakfast?”

“Everyone but us.” Rick stretched, blue jeans and a t-shirt, Daryl down behind him in dark jeans and a flannel with the sleeves ripped off. 

“Eat on the way, we're already late.” She snapped. Maggie and Beth had already loaded the younger kids in the SUV that Maggie and Glenn owned, with Glenn in the front seat, and in the old Mustang Merle owned, that Bobbi drove. Beth slipped into the passenger seat, and honked the horn.

“Aight.” Daryl nodded, letting Rick take his hand in his. Normally he would shy away from affection, which was part of why Jesus and him had not worked out, but all of Rick’s family and all of Daryl’s family know about them, and he isn’t worried about it the way he would normally be.

“‘Mone boys.” Rick waved Colt, Archer, and Carl into the Jeep, and laughed when the boys argued over who had to be in the middle, Carl lost because the twins were bigger and faster than him. Carl is about six inches shorter than the twins, and built more like a kid than a man.

-/-

Rick goes in first, his badge in his pocket, and pythons strapped to his hips. “They are gonna let us go into the yard, with just Merle the other prisoners in his block will be around, but separate from us.” 

Beth and Maggie have Cal and Jet in their arms, Bobbi has little bitty Kane, who is frail and skinny. He eats more than the other two, and Bobbi and Beth had started supplementing formula for him, worried she won't make enough breast milk. 

Rick is leading them into the prison, and Bobbi sighs, low and loud. Merle had never been in a real penitentiary before, never been anywhere like this, where the walls are taller than the mountains. She passes Kane to Daryl, and is in Merle’s arms first, he looks weaker than he has in a long time, his shaved head glinting in the sun light. 

“Withdraws ain’t doin’ ya any favors.” Daryl mutters.

Merle hasn’t spoken yet, he is clinging to Bobbi in a way Rick has only seen once before, when she beat Andrea up and Merle came home, this was the way he felt when he kissed Daryl, he realized in that moment Merle and Bobbi were each others home, two halves of a whole, even though it was unconventional and crazy, but it made sense. 

Rick couldn’t help himself, he laced his arms around Daryl’s waist, which made Daryl blush a little but Merle only nodded his approval, burying his face in her neck once more. “Bobbi, I love you.” 

“I love you too, Merle, wanna met Cal, Jet, and Kane?” Merle nodded, as she Maggie, and Beth introduced him to the little ones.

“Kane ain’t ours.” Merle mumbles. “He ain’t stouty like the babies you grow darlin’, I am so sorry.” Merle has tears in his eyes, looking at the frail life form.

Bobbi doesn’t miss a beat, she just settles down next to Merle, and kisses his temple. “He is ours, darlin’, he's a Dixon same as you n’ me. And I’s gonna raise him up big and strong.” She took Kane from him then, and their older kids were on them.

Archer and Colten are excited telling Merle about the x-box at home, and playing with Carl, soon even Carl is talking to Merle about the fun they have been having, even Daryl promised to take them hunting. Then Winter and August are climbing on their daddies lap, hands talking animatedly about what they want for Christmas - which is Merle at home, then Axel, talking to his daddy, holding Judith’s hand, and telling him about the chickens Rick let them get.

“Got a farm going.” Daryl offers, it’s just him, Bobbi and Merle now, the kids headed back to the car with Rick, Maggie, Glenn, and Beth.

“Sounds like it.” Merle clasp his brother on the shoulder, and 

“What's wrong, Merle?” Bobbi is sitting on his lap, nestled into him, and holding him to her, tight.

“Ain’t gonna last in here, ain’t as young as ‘ah once was, and I’s can’t hold my own in a fight no more, there's some fellas in here, they wanna kill me.” Merle is whispering it low into his young wife's hair. “I just wanted you to know, Bobbi, I really do love you, and fate brought ya too me, is all.”

“Merle, you're meaner than sin, ain’t nothin’ that can kill you, lest you let it.” Daryl growls, hugging his brother, then he looks at Bobbi. “Gonna let you alone, know he gets sexy time, since ya came up here, might see if we can head up the road to that McDonalds....”

Daryl was gone, the guard approached and asked if they would like somewhere to be alone. Merle nodded. “Might be the last time I get to hold ya.” It is whispered in her ear, and the honestness of the statement makes her wonder if he knows something he is not sharing.

Merle has his lips on hers, and is working her clothes off before she can think too much on it, letting him own her in the only way he ever had, she grabs at his shirt to pull it off, chasing the feel of skin on skin, when he stops her. “Busted up pretty bad.”

“Don’t matter to me, darlin’, just wanna feel you.” She kissed his nose, and he laughed, hauling her onto the counter, not caring to use the bed, no clue how many had before them, he pushed her back, kissing her neck and cheek. 

-/-

They don’t talk about it, Bobbi and Daryl, but when the news reaches them that Merle was in a fight, and he didn’t win, he drew his last breath, saying her name, according to the nurse who phones them from the hospital. Rick isn’t home when the news reaches them, that Merle is dead, he doesn’t hear her scream, or see her wreck the kitchen, he doesn’t watch as Daryl grabs Bobbi round the middle, dragging her to the floor, and holding her still as her whole body thrashes and she screams. 

Rick doesn’t phone Maggie and Beth, but they are there when he gets there all the same. Archer and Colt had taken charge when Bobbi lost her control, when Daryl dissolved next to her in a fit of rage and tears, Rick didn’t see them roll on the floor, throwing punches at each other, Rick didn’t hear her cry out for Merle, or see Daryl comfort her, kissing her cheek and neck, muttering “It’ll be alright.” 

The kids, all of them, are upstairs in Rick and Daryl’s room, he learns from Beth, who is cleaning up the glass plates, Bobbi threw and smashed all of them. Rick missed Bobbi and Daryl both, running out the door, and taking off on Merle’s bike, crossbows on their back. Rick missed the moment that Bobbi realized her love was never coming home, the moment she realized the last gift he ever gave her might have been Kane,

Rick didn’t see the assault the two unleashed on the living room, but standing in his mother’s once decedent living room, with Maggie and Glenn trying hard to pick up the shatters of picture frames and the stuffing’ from the couch, but now he stands his on face contorted in rage and pain. When he speaks it is to anyone and everyone at the same time. “Today was supposed to be a good day, got the green light to move Merle to County…” His voice fractures and breaks then.

Anger seizes up in his heart, his man is hurting, Bobbi who he has grown to love is hurting, their children are hurting, and all he can think about is how today should have went. He doesn’t feel Beth or Maggie at first, as they hug him, the feeling only reaches him in an after thought, when Carl and Colt come downstairs. Carl takes his hand, and leads him upstairs, Archer joins Colt and they work to help Maggie and Beth clean.

Carl joins them once Rick is tucked in with the other little ones. “How long will Bobbi and Dar be gone?” He ask, his heart breaking.

“No clue, last time something bad happened, William died, Merle and Daryl were gone three days.” Beth answers, a frown on her face. 

“Momma always comes back.” Colt says after a minute. “All that time she spent trying to straighten daddy up, and it was finally working, now he’s gone, and she’s lost her best friend.” 

Archer hugs his brother, “Momma always said, it would be a cold day in hell when Merle Dixon didn’t come home to her, reckon it’s snowin…” There are tears in both boys eyes, and Carl hugs them, both his best friends to him. 

He knows what it is like to lose both parents, the way Bobbi reacted, Carl is relieved his parents died together, he couldn’t imagine one living without the other. 

Rick doesn’t see his little brother console the twins, all Rick sees is the pain in his own heart, pain that as a policeman he failed, Merle wasn’t perfect but he was a good man. Rick see’s his defeated face the day after Thanksgiving, the way Merle told Bobbi he loved her, how he held her like he knew he was never going to see her again. Two days away from Christmas, and all Rick can see is the sadness in those he loves.

-/-

Daryl and Bobbi are back by Christmas morning, she looks different, to Rick, like a light that once shone so vibrantly in her has been snuffed out, he realizes that Merle was her world, the one thing no one could take from her and yet, he had been taken, and in his absence part of what made her her died. A flame doused in water.

Beth called off her wedding to Noah, apparently, and has decided that now isn’t the time to get married, she is wound tightly around Bobbi, in the recliner, comforting her best friend, and patting her hair. 

Daryl on the same respect, looks like a flame has been lit in him, his whole body is burning hotter, and his eyes are locked on Rick the moment he entered the house. He kissed Rick, not caring who saw, wrapping his arms tight around him, and pressing his forehead to Rick's when he pulled back. “Wanna be with ya, forever.” Daryl says it even and calm, “Wanna know love like she does, wanna feel that pain when you're not here.”

Rick understands what Daryl means, Bobbi had loved so hard, and so fiercely for so long, that the silence that now seems to dance around her is a furtherment of her love for Merle, every fiber of her for so long wanted to be his, was his, loved him, lived life by his rules, managed to stay ahead on luck, only. 

Now she looks like the fight is knocked out of her, they open gifts around her, boxes wrapped for Merle remain wrapped, they will be buried with him. Beth never leaves Bobbi’s side, her hand continuously rubbing her hair, nuzzling her, anything to keep her calm. 

-/-

Rick would call it a daze, what Bobbi was in, but it was something else altogether. He was home alone with her, four months to the day they visited Merle when he heard her scream. This one was different, it almost sounded like joy.

He scrambled to the bathroom and wrenched the door open, the light, it was dangerously close to being back in her eyes as she waved the pregnancy test in his face. “He left me something.” She managed to say, tears down her face, and her arms around Rick’s neck.

He caught on, and hugged her to him, pressing her head into his chest. Holding her close. The three little ones - Cal, Jet, and Kane are almost six months old now. “Shall I call Daryl?” He ask, cautiously.

Her brow is furrowed as she nods, and for the first time since the night Merle died, she is in the kitchen, muttering about making a mess, and she is raiding the fridge, looking for what she can cook for dinner. Rick watches, with rapt interest, Merle had saved her from the grave.

Daryl comes home early, after Rick phones him. He smiles at Bobbi, and see’s that she is cooking, and almost back to normal. Beth is the next one home, hanging on Bobbi like she has for the last several months, her arms around Bobbi’s shoulders. There is something there, beyond friendship, but Rick and Daryl have kept from saying anything, since Beth was the only one keeping Bobbi going. 

“Gonna have a big meal, gonna get back to life.” She says as she moves around the kitchen. “Gonna see Carol about getting my job back.” She muttered, rubbing her arms, eyes looking at Beth. “Or see if Maggie needs someone down at the bar…”

“I’ll stay at the bar, you just get on at the dinner.” Rick grumbles kissing Bobbi’s forehead. 

Rick stopped being a cop, after Merle, the system had failed a good man, and Rick had felt he personally failed his Dixon’s. Daryl’s arms around his middle, and lips pressed to his neck, make Rick breathe steady, like he isn’t alive unless Daryl is there, and he knows this is what life is like for Bobbi, something about Dixon’s they make you forget who you are and what life is, unless they are loving you.

They may not be alright, just yet, but the love of Dixon’s was gonna see them through. “We got a wedding to plan, don’t we?” Bobbi is looking between Daryl and Rick, and he knows what she is on about, they were waiting until she was better, to plan anything. Beth has her arms around Bobbi still, and is hanging on like with out Bobbi there is no life. “Since Beth decided she didn’t love Noah.”

“Ya know, a wise woman once told me, marriage ain’t gotta be for love, but it helps if it is.” Beth kissed at Bobbi’s cheek, then whirled away from her, towards the front door to welcome the kids in, and Maggie is dropping off the babies, rushing past her sister and kissing Bobbi on the forehead, rubbing her waist and smiling.

Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed, but with dinner on the table, and both Dixon’s looking more alive than they had in months, Rick’s praying to whatever God there is that they continue to love him through life.


End file.
